My Life Directed by Nicholas Winding Refn, the new documentary directed by Refn’s wife Liv Corfixen, shows the tumultuous making of director Refn’s 2013 film Only God Forgives. After receiving the Best Director Award at the 2011 Cannes Film Festival for Drive, a highly stylized crime-thriller set in Los Angeles, as well as critical and public acclaim, Refn was under tremendous pressure to make a follow-up that would meet audience and critic’s expectations. However, as an auteur in a position to move forward as he saw fit, Refn decided to write and direct Only God Forgives, a far less commercially viable film with a barebones story involving a son, his drug dealing foul-mouthed abusive mother, and constant abrasive violence, set in the exotic locale of Bangkok, Thailand.
Yet the tension from his success with Drive and the expectations it created weighed heavily on Refn, and it was in Bangkok during the post-production of Only God Forgives that his wife Liv Corfixen began filming, looking to document her husband’s struggle. My Life Directed by Nicholas Winding Refn was screened as part of Beyond Fest at the Egyptian Theater in Hollywood October 2, 2014, with Corfixen introducing the film, and then being joined by Refn and Cliff Martinez, the composer for Drive and Only God Forgives, for a Q & A after. A screening of Only God Forgives followed.
Early in My Life Refn looks at a wall full of index cards in a grid, laying out the scenes of Only God Forgives. “I think of a film like game of chess,” Refn says, “Each scene is me making a move and then the audience responds with their reaction. If they like the film at the end, I’ve checkmated them. If they don’t, then I’m checkmated.” It’s an interesting comment from someone seemingly hell-bent on not creating another Drive, a film that definitely “checkmated” a large part of its audience. At times throughout My Life Refn claims not to be interested in commercial success, but his analogy provides insight into not only his mindset at the time, but the way he dictates the flow and structure of his films. “People say I always make films about crime,” Refn says, agitated by this perceived repetition. “But it’s like a Shakespearean royal family, because it’s always a matter of life and death. Its more exciting.” So begins My Life, Refn wracked with doubt but ready to tackle the project.
“I don’t know what this film is about,” Refn confesses shortly after, looking lost and depressed. Enter Ryan Gosling, Refn’s inspiration and vital collaborator for Drive and Only God Forgives. It’s immediately clear what Refn sees in Gosling, since Gosling is essentially the Driver character from Drive, albeit with more wisecracking. Gosling spends times with Refn and his family in the Bangkok apartment, the Zen-ed out movie star foil to Refn’s cerebral director crackup. When Gosling and Refn consider attending a Drive screening in Bangkok for which they will be paid cash, much needed to finance Only God Forgives, Gosling asks, “Will they put the money in a briefcase? I’ll do it if they put it in a briefcase.” Indeed, Gosling brings some much need levity to the situation, seeing the humor where Refn only sees two people prostituting themselves for a labor of love.
The rest of the film shows various scenes of Only God Forgives being made, with the predictable moments of frustration and celebration. A large part of the film is devoted to Refn and Corfixen’s relationship and the tension Refn’s career causes on it. Corfixen began the film because she didn’t want to play the role of housewife while Refn worked, and while the film depicts her angst on the matter to a certain extent, it was the Q & A following the screening which offered the most insightful and entertaining commentary of the evening. “I told her to do one thing in her film and she told me to shut the f*ck up,” Refn told the audience, addressing the fact My Life was Corfixen’s project and hers alone. The subject of Refn’s parents, particularly his mother, shed light on Only God Forgives. “Growing up in New York, my mother was a socialist feminist Scandinavian woman who hated everything American,” Refn commented, “And since she had photographed rock starts in the ‘60s, the only way I could rebel was to go see American horror movies. So when I was fourteen I went and saw the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and for me the violence in Only God Forgives completes a circle in my head that started with Massacre.” Though Refn has a good relationship with his parents, who stayed with him in Los Angeles while he was making Drive, it was not hard to begin to discern the inspiration behind Only God Forgives, in which Julian, played by Gosling, continually rebels against his monstrous, overbearing mother Crystal, played by Kristen Scott Thomas, as well as the shocking violence throughout the film. Coupled with Refn’s suggestion in My Life that Only God Forgives is “childish,” surely Refn feared the film would be perceived as a pulpy act of self-indulgent catharsis rather than high art. Perhaps Refn knows the former to be a given, and it’s the latter that he’s really worried about.
“Every movie I make is like this,” Refn said of the tortured filmmaking process depicted in My Life Directed by Nicholas Winding Refn. “And any director who says otherwise is lying.” By just seeing the stand-alone film, one could take away a variety of conclusions about the success of the Only God Forgives project, but Refn confirmed a positive outcome at the Q & A. Only God Forgives is a polarizing film, and Refn reads aloud a vehemently negative review of it in My Life. “He hates me so much he loves me,” Refn says of the critic, and it’s the fact that Only God Forgives is so polarizing that convinces Refn he’s made good art. On receiving negative reviews Refn commented, “You wallow in self-pity for a little while, but then you think, well my wife’s pretty hot, and my kids are beautiful, and we got first class plane tickets back to LA, so f*ck ‘em.” Coming from a man who throughout the evening said, “I should have won the Palme d’Or for Only God Forgives,” while adding later, “I sat with my fingers in my ears and my eyes closed during the screening at Cannes, it’s so painful, I never watch my own films after they’re done,” a picture emerged of a man as insecure and human as anyone, with an ego that perhaps only God himself could forgive, and with a wife who loves him anyway.
Yet the tension from his success with Drive and the expectations it created weighed heavily on Refn, and it was in Bangkok during the post-production of Only God Forgives that his wife Liv Corfixen began filming, looking to document her husband’s struggle. My Life Directed by Nicholas Winding Refn was screened as part of Beyond Fest at the Egyptian Theater in Hollywood October 2, 2014, with Corfixen introducing the film, and then being joined by Refn and Cliff Martinez, the composer for Drive and Only God Forgives, for a Q & A after. A screening of Only God Forgives followed.
Early in My Life Refn looks at a wall full of index cards in a grid, laying out the scenes of Only God Forgives. “I think of a film like game of chess,” Refn says, “Each scene is me making a move and then the audience responds with their reaction. If they like the film at the end, I’ve checkmated them. If they don’t, then I’m checkmated.” It’s an interesting comment from someone seemingly hell-bent on not creating another Drive, a film that definitely “checkmated” a large part of its audience. At times throughout My Life Refn claims not to be interested in commercial success, but his analogy provides insight into not only his mindset at the time, but the way he dictates the flow and structure of his films. “People say I always make films about crime,” Refn says, agitated by this perceived repetition. “But it’s like a Shakespearean royal family, because it’s always a matter of life and death. Its more exciting.” So begins My Life, Refn wracked with doubt but ready to tackle the project.
“I don’t know what this film is about,” Refn confesses shortly after, looking lost and depressed. Enter Ryan Gosling, Refn’s inspiration and vital collaborator for Drive and Only God Forgives. It’s immediately clear what Refn sees in Gosling, since Gosling is essentially the Driver character from Drive, albeit with more wisecracking. Gosling spends times with Refn and his family in the Bangkok apartment, the Zen-ed out movie star foil to Refn’s cerebral director crackup. When Gosling and Refn consider attending a Drive screening in Bangkok for which they will be paid cash, much needed to finance Only God Forgives, Gosling asks, “Will they put the money in a briefcase? I’ll do it if they put it in a briefcase.” Indeed, Gosling brings some much need levity to the situation, seeing the humor where Refn only sees two people prostituting themselves for a labor of love.
The rest of the film shows various scenes of Only God Forgives being made, with the predictable moments of frustration and celebration. A large part of the film is devoted to Refn and Corfixen’s relationship and the tension Refn’s career causes on it. Corfixen began the film because she didn’t want to play the role of housewife while Refn worked, and while the film depicts her angst on the matter to a certain extent, it was the Q & A following the screening which offered the most insightful and entertaining commentary of the evening. “I told her to do one thing in her film and she told me to shut the f*ck up,” Refn told the audience, addressing the fact My Life was Corfixen’s project and hers alone. The subject of Refn’s parents, particularly his mother, shed light on Only God Forgives. “Growing up in New York, my mother was a socialist feminist Scandinavian woman who hated everything American,” Refn commented, “And since she had photographed rock starts in the ‘60s, the only way I could rebel was to go see American horror movies. So when I was fourteen I went and saw the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and for me the violence in Only God Forgives completes a circle in my head that started with Massacre.” Though Refn has a good relationship with his parents, who stayed with him in Los Angeles while he was making Drive, it was not hard to begin to discern the inspiration behind Only God Forgives, in which Julian, played by Gosling, continually rebels against his monstrous, overbearing mother Crystal, played by Kristen Scott Thomas, as well as the shocking violence throughout the film. Coupled with Refn’s suggestion in My Life that Only God Forgives is “childish,” surely Refn feared the film would be perceived as a pulpy act of self-indulgent catharsis rather than high art. Perhaps Refn knows the former to be a given, and it’s the latter that he’s really worried about.
“Every movie I make is like this,” Refn said of the tortured filmmaking process depicted in My Life Directed by Nicholas Winding Refn. “And any director who says otherwise is lying.” By just seeing the stand-alone film, one could take away a variety of conclusions about the success of the Only God Forgives project, but Refn confirmed a positive outcome at the Q & A. Only God Forgives is a polarizing film, and Refn reads aloud a vehemently negative review of it in My Life. “He hates me so much he loves me,” Refn says of the critic, and it’s the fact that Only God Forgives is so polarizing that convinces Refn he’s made good art. On receiving negative reviews Refn commented, “You wallow in self-pity for a little while, but then you think, well my wife’s pretty hot, and my kids are beautiful, and we got first class plane tickets back to LA, so f*ck ‘em.” Coming from a man who throughout the evening said, “I should have won the Palme d’Or for Only God Forgives,” while adding later, “I sat with my fingers in my ears and my eyes closed during the screening at Cannes, it’s so painful, I never watch my own films after they’re done,” a picture emerged of a man as insecure and human as anyone, with an ego that perhaps only God himself could forgive, and with a wife who loves him anyway.
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